My Love Affair with the High Jump

If being an athlete is your profession, you will inevitably ride a wave of emotions in a given season – never mind your career. Great performances, victories and results will give way to euphoric feelings, while defeats, injuries and inferior performances/results can make you question the meaning of life. Every great loss, I’ve experienced in Athletics has always felt similar to a break-up. Yes, high jump has broken my heart numerous times and filled it with overflowing joy.

Probably one of my lowest moments, would be the 2006 Commonwealth Games, in Melbourne. To this day, I cannot explain what happened. I warmed up great. I felt fantastic. I was ranked to win, and I no-heighted. A no-height means I failed to clear any height. A trailing heel, clipping the bar was my arch enemy. I can remember crying my eyes and heart out underneath the stadium, and for days thereafter.

Comparatively, the feelings I’ve experienced at my highest levels of performances have been incredible. I can remember last year (after struggling to qualify for the Olympic Games) and finally doing so at the last possible moment how ecstatic I was. My joy had moved me to a river of tears… And in my happiest moment it was further enhanced by knowing the challenges I faced to get there.

Essentially, as athletes we are pouring our heart and soul into the passion of our sport and the belief that something great awaits us. Well, at least for me that is the case. It’s like loving someone with all of yourself, and your only wish is for them to love you in return. If they were to cheat on you, hurt you, break-up with you or fail to return the feeling of love, your heart may be left wounded. However, if they were to love you in return, or better yet, love you in away surpassing anything you could imagine, words may not be able to explain the feeling of joy that might fill you. This is my love affair with the high jump.

I cannot wait to experience a jump surpassing anything I could imagine. There is definitely something magical and awesome, when I am in flight over the bar -- and I know I have a huge clearance above the bar, when the bar is set at a high height. It literally feels like flying and I have nothing but time!

I guess it is for those moments of high, that it worth pummeling myself in training and accepting my defeats. And as, cliché as it may seem, it truly is about the journey. Ahh… Track & Field – gotta love it.

Just one request – could I experience a dose of some serious deep returned love from the high jump in the near future??? Maybe like in my next competition? Just wondering??? ;)

In Love,
Nicole

Beautiful U R

~ Deborah Cox

Through life
Things may not always go right
For you

And those times
Just leave it behind cause
Sometimes you gotta play the game
Just to survive
Without losing yourself
It's a fight, it's true
It takes time
Don't have all the answers
No matter how hard it gets
Hold on to what's inside

Don't ever let nobody bring you down, girl
Don't ever let nobody tear your world apart
Look in the mirror and see who you are
Beautiful U R

In the dark,
The pain chips away at your heart, so deep
Can't u see? Can't you see?
See the light in the distance
Open up your eyes, look
Look to the sky and believe
There's much more to life when you're free
That's the key

And in time
You will find all the answers
Don't have to lose your pride
Hold on to what's inside

Don't ever let nobody bring you down, girl
Don't ever let nobody tear your world apart
Look in the mirror and see who you are
Beautiful U R

Don't ever let nobody bring you down, girl
Don't ever let nobody tear your world apart
Look in the mirror and see who you are
Beautiful U R


Don't care what they say anymore

There's no time to be insecure
I'm leavin' it all out the door
She's staring me in the face
She's taking it day by day
I'm finally on my way

Don't ever let nobody bring you down, girl
Don't ever let nobody tear your world apart
Look in the mirror and see who you are
Beautiful U R

Don't ever let nobody bring you down, girl
Don't ever let nobody tear your world apart
Look in the mirror and see who you are
Beautiful U R

Beautiful U R, Beautiful U R

Beautiful U R, Beautiful U R

"Canadian's not welcome" -- so says John from Blockbuster

Well, it’s been a while since my last blog… but duty such as life, called, flooding my life with various obligations…. Not too worry, I’ve returned to the world of blogging.

Well, it’s the eve of Good Friday and the day after Passover… one of my most favorite times of the year. I had prepared myself to engage in my regular Christian activities, including watching the Ten Commandments and the Passion of the Christ…. However, it appears this isn’t to be the case. Thanks to John at Blockbuster.

Making a stop at blockbuster, I anxiously checked out with the two movies in hand. When asked if I had my Blockbuster card, I realized I didn’t have it, which is a usual for me. My wallet is already filled with other junk, that if I kept my entire movie and other special cards, it would be too full to carry even in my purse. Now, usually when I rent my movie, they will take my phone number, however, apparently John couldn’t do this. I had to refill out a new application form.

Now I’ll admit, I was a little put off with this, but went ahead with ‘procedure.” However, when it came time for John’s approval, he took one look at my application form, ripped it up and said I couldn’t rent if I had a Canadian driver’s license!

How is this possible??? I mean this was the very same place which issued my blockbuster card in the first place. As a Canadian, I can buy a car, a house, or have a credit card, but I can’t have a blockbuster card? Are you serious??? Obviously, I’m put off. It’s made me want to take my business elsewhere, such as Hollywood Videos or Netflicks. I mean, is the video rental business really in a position to be selective about their customers. If you ask me, John, who happens to be the manager, is on a power trip… I’m just glad he’s not the usher boy at the movies… You’re Canadian --- get to the back of the line!

And what makes this story even more tragic, is he ripped up my application with my address, credit card and driver’s license number still in tack, for anyone to rummage through the garbage and find my info. Thank God, I went through the garbage and shredded them myself.

Desperately seeking a new video rental company,
Nicole

A Victim of Breaking & Entering -- Take anything just Not my Lenovo IdeaPad OR High Jump Spikes

So, I've been wondering what I have done to upset the balance of the world, making me a target for revenge. No seriously, my start to the 2009 has been a challenging one -- death of a friend, an injury, a lump named Ralph...etc.... And just two nights ago, my car was broken into and $5000 worth of goods were stolen. I think I might have reached my limit after the car incidence.

Two days ago, my friend Megan Metcalfe was passing through Toronto, and had to stay the night. She's from Edmonton, Alberta and trains in Virgina, but had never been out & about the sites in Toronto. I mean you just can't come to Toronto and not SEE Toronto - so, I offered to be her personal Tour Guide and take her around.

It was great, totally unplanned and spur of the moment kind of thing. Our tour began with the CN Tower (the 2nd tallest free standing building in the world and a definite tourist attraction). We ended up even eating dinner at the 360* Restaurant, which is at the top of CN Tower and revolves around the city.

We completed the Toronto Tour musts -- standing on the glass floor at the top of the CN Tower, going outside the top of the tower and taking funny pictures in the gift shop -- we decided to call it a night. Indeed, it was a good night! ... Until we returned to my car.

As we walked towards my car I noticed some glass and a dark film on the ground. In a state of shock I slowly looked up to my car thinking "No, not my car! No, not my car!" and saw that indeed it was MY car! AHHHHHHH!!!! I was sick to my stomach! Not only had my car window been broken, the thief made off with my knapsack, which had my red LENOVO IdeaPad U1110, my Flip Video and dissertation work in it! AND my training bag.... Like REALLY do they really need my workout plan and high jump spike!

I couldn't help feeling dirty and violated. It's really an unpleasant feeling... I drove home with regrets, should ofs and could ofs, and realized that I should be glad my friend and I are not hurt and they didn't steal my car. I guess shit really happens... (sorry for the profanity, but it seems the most appropriate word at this time.)

And while my bag wasn't in clear view, it wasn't hidden either, so it's taught me a lesson in that regard. According to the security guard, people will even brake into cars over spare change.

Suffice, to say my friend saw both extremes of a big city -- the Good and the Bad. For me it was a braking point, because, it just seems another random misfortune, I've had within a span of 2 months. I desperately need to be that sun the dog shines on! The way I figure, if I get through all the hard, and challenging stuff now, the rest of my year just has to be BETTER! Whoops, scratch that -- Phenomenal!

Glass half full,

Nicole

A Lump in the Breast

It’s crazy how in an instance your life can change. Two weeks ago my biggest concerns were related to high jump and my dissertation proposal. However, that quickly changed when I discovered a lump in my breast in a random check.

Having dealt with the emotions, I felt it was important to speak of this experience candidly on my blog. I feel no shame and least of all desire no pity. However, if I can make one woman begin to conduct regular breast checks for lumps, I will have succeeded in my goal.

When I discovered the lump I must have sat on my bed for 20 minutes grappling over what I had felt – “Was this really a lump?” “Is it serious” “Is it cancerous?” “How can this be, I’m too young to find a lump?!”

What I had felt was small, but quite distinct; and it felt hard but rubbery. This was something, I had never felt before! And although I didn’t meet the criteria for being at risk for breast cancer, I certainly wasn’t arrogant enough to believe I was impervious to it. Quite the contrary.

I was terrified, and for once, I really was truly confronted with my own mortality, as well as what was really important to me. I have been a long supporter of breast cancer research and its victims, but, hadn’t ever really contemplated the possibility that I could be a face of breast cancer… until last week.

Now, not all lumps are cancerous. In fact, there are four main types of lumps, and many women will have lumps in their lifetime that are not cancerous…. This I learned as I immersed myself in a crash course in breast lumps and breast cancer.

Still, when you are undergoing tests to rule out cancer it can be a terrifying experience. After having some tests performed my lump is apparently just a lump. THANK GOD! Definitely, good news I can handle. Still, just to be safe, we’ll be keeping a close eye on Ralph.

I am so incredibly grateful for these results! And in my moment of gratitude I couldn’t help but wonder about the women who aren’t so fortunate and how they are making steps to treat not just a lump…. How their lives will change? Will she be successful? Will she live a full life? Or is her battle longer and larger than she planned?

I don’t know much but I know that if actions can prevent breast cancer (i.e. a healthy lifestyle) or can aid in early detection, I will engage in these actions. I’ve certainly learned the importance of regular breast checks! Historically, I’ve never been regular with checking for lumps…. possibly delusional by my age and such. But, that was being foolish! Breast cancer does not discriminate against age or race.

Like clock work I will ALWAYS conduct regular breast checks. I hope you and your loved one will do the same. After all early detection is your first line of defense!

A forever changed woman,
Nicole Wendy Forrester

IF TODAY WAS YOUR LAST DAY

My best friend gave me the best advice
He said each day's a gift and not a given right
Leave no stone unturned, leave your fears behind
And try to take the path less traveled by
That first step you take is the longest stride

If today was your last day
Tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have?
If today was your last day


Against the grain should be a way of life
what´s worth the prize is always worth the fight
Every second counts 'cause there´s no second try
So live like you´ll never live it twice
don´t take the free ride in your own life

If today was your last day
Tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have?
Would you call old friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories
Would you forgive your enemies?
Would you find that one you´re dreamin' of?
Swear up and down to God above
That you finally fall in love
If today was your last day

If today was your last day
Would you make your mark by mending a broken heart?
You know it´s never too late to shoot for the stars
Regardless of who you are
So do whatever it takes
'Cause you can´t rewind a moment in this life
Let nothin' stand in your way
Cause the hands of time are never on your side

If today was your last day
Tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have?
Would you call old friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories
Would you forgive your enemies?
Would you find that one you´re dreamin' of?
Swear up and down to God above
That you finally fall in love
If today was your last day

~by Nickelback

You've Got Mail!

One of my biggest pet peeve is people who do not reply to emails or take their time getting back to me… especially if I’ve taken time in sending a thoughtful email. It’s very ANNOYING! Well, recently, it seems more often than not I have been guilty of this crime…. Boy do I hate being wrong.

An influx of emails combined with a busy schedule, and fatigue has allowed my inbox to rise weekly to an unsightly number that makes it discouraging to even attempt to respond to one email. Last week I was up over 1300 in emails I needed to read, reply or delete!!!! I finally, sat down and over a span of 3 days really went to work to go through these emails. However, as I got to the bottom of my emails I found myself feeling horrible.

Yes, I had received some thoughtful emails, that in my opinion deserved an efficient reply and a mutual thoughtful email. I started to think how I would feel if I was in their position, and realized my narrow room for acceptance of tardy replies. To make up for this, I’ve now found myself trying to reply as quickly as the emails are sent. This is a tiresome duty. So, now I am struggling to find a median, in which I can create a process of replying to emails…..

I can’t help but find myself remembering the days of postal mail being the front runner in communication (besides phones). How I long for those days. I can’t help wondering what the state of emails will be in 10 years time.

A subscriber to emails,
Nicole